Cultural Offerings

To all the die hard fans who have been refreshing the Ramblings every hour in the hopes of finding a new post, I sincerely apologize. However, if you become a "follower" of the blog, then you will be conveniently notified when I have something else to ramble about. And you'll be feeding my ego. Anyway, your sleepless nights can now cease as I should be able to put up a few overdue posts in the next few days. My excuses for not having the time to write include teaching, snorkeling, kayaking, riding in song theaws (pictured above, they function as multi-person taxis), and generally adopting a "Thai time" schedule. Tough life, I know. As such, I have not had the chance to relay a few of my more "interesting" Thai experiences until now.

A few weeks ago, a group of us ventured out into the cosmopolitan mecca of Ao Luk in search of the best cultural offerings that our adopted hometown had to offer. After learning that both the Ao Luk Symphony Orchestra and the Ao Luk Opera were on indefinite hiatuses, we opted to go to a karaoke bar. Actually, that's not entirely accurate. We went to two karaoke bars. After a thoroughly satisfying dinner, we proceeded down the dark main road and were drawn into the first watering hole by the faint sound of music echoing from behind a stone barrier. We ascended the stairs and took hold of what lay before us on the open-air deck. Despite our efforts to find some wholesome fun, we had stumbled into what appeared to be some sort of combination of a go-go bar and a family restaurant. Oh, they had karaoke too, but you had to be Thai, a woman and clad in a bikini in order to participate (0 for 3 for me). Despite the minimal attire of the waitresses and "singers," a large portion of the restaurant's patrons that evening were families. A far cry from my youth spent watching the singing animals at Chucky Cheese, these families instead enjoy watching bored-looking Thai women in bathing suits sing karaoke. And sing poorly, I might add. Growing increasingly uncomfortable in sharing the room with the leering waitresses, we decided to down our beers and find alternative entertainment for the rest of the evening.

Feeling slightly dazed after one of the more surreal experiences of my journey, I was convinced that the next locale would HAVE to be bit more conventional in both its karaoke offerings and the dress code of its wait staff. I was wrong. Located next door, we entered a small shed that housed a karaoke machine, a handful of tables and a large contingent of Thai "girly boys" encompassing the perimeter of the bar. What's a Thai "girly boy"? Quite simply, they are Thai young men whose gender is not easily discerned at first glance. I have been told that since Thai boys are rather effeminate in both their personal mannerisms and their interactions with one another, becoming a "girly boy" is a natural progression of sorts. Initially, I thought that such a concentration of "girly boys" in one locale must be an unusual occurrence. How many could there be? However, my mind was changed when I recently saw a restaurant advertisement for an all-you-can-eat buffet. There was a rate for men, women/children, aaannnddd girly boys. If you have your own price level at a buffet, you've clearly established a presence.

Back to the evening at hand. As we entered the shed/bar, the girly boys gradually began to move to one corner, leaving the karaoke machine unattended. Now, I always jump at the chance to belt out a spirited rendition of "Total Eclipse of the Heart" or "Love Bites" (invariably followed by a standing ovation from the awestruck crowd), but I am completely unfamiliar with the skills necessary to harmonize in the Thai dialect. Thai is a very tonal-based language. However, their karaoke seems to focus less on singing and more on incorporating electronic instruments and bizarre action sequences into the videos. But what struck me as the oddest element of the scene was the non-involvement of the audience. As we sat there not being served drinks (there apparently was no wait staff), none of the locals got up to sing. Instead, all of the patrons seemed to enjoy just watching the videos. After devoting a good 30 seconds of thought to it, I reasoned that MTV's tentacles must not have yet reached Thailand and the locals have instead made going to the karaoke bar the popular alternative. I know that makes no sense, but neither did the events of the night.

We stayed a while, practiced our Thai (greetings and numbers mostly) and eventually made our way back home. But not before my buddy Sean tried to practice his Thai skills with a dog he thought was tied to a pole. It wasn't. Needless to say, we walked at a brisker pace until arriving back safely. Yet another strange evening in Thailand.